Dating with Anxiety
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Why Online Dating Can Drive You Bananas-Ass Crazy

Online Dating Anxiety Anxious Scared Nervous Shy

Today I learned about a new online dating app. Or, I think it’s an app.

I’m visiting California for a friend’s upcoming wedding and today, as I walked along the heated sidewalks of downtown, another friend told me he was using something called Scruff.

“Scruff?” I asked, positive I’d heard wrong since Scruff is obviously the name for a dog-adoption agency (right!?)

“It’s similar to Grindr. A dating app. Only nicer and for guys with, you know, scruff. Like beards.”

Since I’d never once in my life heard of Scruff, I had to investigate. It is just like he explained: a dating app for gay men who, apparently, are scruffy. This friend was the same one who introduced me to the world of Grindr, years before. And he was the one who originally explained to me how Tinder works. And then just few months back I found myself asking a younger coworker to, just one more time, explain how SnapChat works.

“Wait . . . what is it?” I heard myself ask, as if I’d just dropped my cane while trying to retrieve my false teeth which I’d also just dropped.

If you’re in the dating world and are at all tech-savvy, let’s be real for a second: there are more online dating possibilities than you could possibly even USE and it feels like every damn day another one comes out. The world is full of innovative people. This creativity is fueling our lust and love and loneliness. How do you know which one to use? How do you know if you even WANT to use one?

I find myself endlessly and embarrassingly behind the times. I only got my first smart phone last year. When I was trying to date I used OK Cupid and E-Harmony, but from what it sounds like these two websites are now one of approximately 5 million other sites I could try and use.

And then, even if you choose to put yourself out there, people can be cruel. They can want something different than you. They can LIE oh-so-easily. They can catfish the shit out of each other (refer back to “people can be cruel”). They can lie, they will lie, and they can disappear without any warning.

This blog post doesn’t have any solid advice for you since I’m still reeling from the conversation I had earlier today about Scruff. It makes me spiral in wondering all the other details I don’t know about the current dating world. I drove home wondering how on earth I was supposed to be using my blog to provide dating advice to my readers when I didn’t even know Scruff existed.

I don’t know, guys. If you’re out in the dating world using all this technology I commend you.
Stay safe.
Stay honest.
Stay above all the crazy that can drag you under when you’re trying to decide to swipe right or swipe left.




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