All posts tagged: Inspiration

Collecting Those Relationship Blueprints

It would be so nice if in third grade we all sat down, opened our Relationship Textbooks, and started learning a set of skills. But, unfortunately, that shit doesn’t happen. In childhood we aren’t all taught the skills necessary to build solid, strong relationships. For the majority of us we learn how to “relationship” by what we see and observe in the relationships around us. I know, personally, that my anxiety often rattles around in my brain with negative thoughts. My skull is a gumball machine, my negative thoughts are hideously moldy gumballs, and they love to try and accumulate. Over the years I have spent way too much time thinking about all the things I “should” be doing better or that I “could” have done differently. I have spent a lot of time fixating on what “might” go wrong in the near future/distant future/hypothetical futures. And when it comes to my intimate relationships and the years I spent trying to enter into the dating world I spent a hell of a lot of time hating myself and my …

How to be smart and act smart even if have anxiety

Look Smart, Act Smart, Feel Smart, Be Smart

In Junior High a friend of mine bought a new pair of glasses. The glasses had black frames, were chic, and they were 100% fake. The lenses were straight-up plastic. And I envied her like other girl’s my age envied the choker-clad models in dELiA*s catalogs (RIP). I’ve always loved the look of glasses. This friend came to school with her new, not-even-close-to-being-necessary glasses and started jokingly saying the phrase “Look smart, act smart, feel smart, be smart” and by God that saying has stuck with me for over fifteen years. It’s one of my favorite sayings along with “THE SWEET CREAM RISES TO THE TOP” (*said with a shaking fist*). I struggle with self-confidence. Due to my superhuman power of being as sensitive as a peach with no skin rolling down the hill into a rock quarry, I am easily bruised. My confidence is shaken in a light breeze. Since I’ve spent a fair amount of time during both my childhood and adult life in a state of worry (aka ALL the time) I’ve …