In the name of your heart, in the name of love, start taking these risks:
1. Risk being misunderstood. Speak from your heart and speak your truths. While you can’t control whether or not someone understands you, you do get to control how honest you are.
You are stronger than you think.
It often feels like this: If you’re single, and want to meet someone, you’re supposed to go to bars on the weekend and try to chat with attractive people like you’re some James Bond of your local neighborhood. Be cool But what if you don’t like going to bars? Or you’ve been going to bars for years and years and years and have never come close to meeting anyone? Or you prefer to stay in watching Netflix on your Friday nights? You’ll hear the usual advice. Join a club. Join a gym. Go to Farmer’s Markets. Meet through mutual friends. Speed dating. Online dating. Craigslist. Grocery Stores. Blind dates set up by your dentist (this is how I went on my one and only blind date). The truth is, there are endless places on this Earth where you could potentially meet a special someone. People meet on dirty pee-filled subways, in grade school, in line for take-out, in times of war, in times of peace. People meet. But it feels impossible. I know from experience. …
1) Feel the Decision I can’t emphasize this enough: try to understand how you feel about a decision or situation. Not what you think you should feel. Or what you think others will feel. How do you feel? In your gut? In your heart? When you think of the situation, how do you feel physically? If you need a more concrete exercise write down all the adjectives you associate with your situation. 2) Learn to Categorize those Feelings Once you’ve started to figure out how you feel, then break it down even further. For example, one of the emotions I’m having is “fear.” But I don’t want that fear to control me or dictate the direction I’m taking. I want to understand where that fear is coming from. Here’s some of it: Fear of not finding another part-time job. Fear of my family being disappointed in me. Fear of not being able to pay my bills. Fear of not finding time to write. This allows me to see that, while I’m feeling afraid of making this change, …
The Anxious Girl's Guide to Dating 