All posts tagged: Text messaging

Ask What You Want Wednesday: Holiday Distance Anxiety

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Nearly two weeks ago I started spending time with a very lovely man who I met through mutual friends. Being with him is wonderful. He is very calm, kind, and we don’t stop talking. I feel as though I’m falling for him very quickly. Now, over the holidays, all I have to rely on for contact are very sparse texts. I’m an avid texter, and he’s not. I’ve heard this is just how he is and his friends all have difficulty getting in touch with him. Waiting for him to respond to me is torture. Having anxiety alongside feeling strongly for him very fast, then facing separation over the holidays has been an absolute nightmare. Dating and the holidays as separate concepts are bad enough for the anxious, but both together are horrific.   Do you have any advice on how I can chill the heck out over Christmas and trust that it will work out if it’s meant to? Okay, let me tell you right here right now THIS IS SUCH A COMMON EXPERIENCE. Not only do the holidays bring …

Why it can help anxiety about dating if you write in a journal

Write Your Emotions Down

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Sometimes my thoughts start working in overdrive, and not always with positive things. If I’m upset about something, my brain does NOT stop. I spiral. I drown. I lay awake as if I’ve found myself in the middle of a lake and my thoughts are thousands of fish, surrounding me, hitting me in the face, threading between my limbs, I can’t breath I don’t know how I even got there. The brain of a person with anxiety shares a lot of qualities with the brain of someone with OCD or depression. And a lot this has to do with repeated thoughts. This especially happens to me when I am feeling angry or hurt. Which means it probably is directed at another human being. Instead of bolting out of bed and immediately calling the person or texting them to tell them what I think, I instead get up and head to a journal. Or my computer. And I write them a letter. The letter tries to explain why I feel the way I feel. This letter is …